Goodnight
by Fonique2
Summary: Goodnight Dan...my love. Dedicated to my dearly beloved. January 7, 2007.


She was headed to the cemetary again. It was nothing new, of course. However, as busy as I was, even I could tell Tsunade-sensei had been there more than usual this past week.

It is not only I who has noticed the shocking silence and often absence of Tsunade-sensei. These past days, Sensei's other student, Haruno Sakura, has been noticing as well. Although the two of us rarely talk, the deep concern raidiating off of the two of us was evident to us both.

I've also noticed a change in Shizuna-san's character as well. Usually she often worries over Tsunade-sensei. Although I can see the obvious concern in her brown eyes, she hasn't said much to Tsunade-sensei besides the usual business discussion.

Today, as I watched her head to the cemetary through the glass window of the hospital, I wondered about Tsunade-sensei. I knew about Dan, her lover who had died on a mission with Tsunade-sensei many years ago. As far as I knew, Dan had died with Sensei trying to save him. It would take a complete moron for you not to noticed the blame in her golden eyes. After all these years she still missed him. After all these years she still loved him. That is true love.

"Kohaku-chan?"

The sound of my name snapped me from my thoughts. I turned from the window, my gaze resting on Shizune-san who now stood behind me. Tonton rested snuggly in her arms.

"Shizune-san...?" I stared at her in question after bowing politely.

What she previously had to say to me must not have been important because she switched the topic. "What are you doing?"

I glanced back to the window, responding in a soft voice. "Tsunade-sensei left again."

An audible sigh escaped the pale lips of Shizune-san. She stepped up next to me, staring out the large window. I glanced to her, ten looked out the window as well.

"She really does miss him..." Shizune-san whispered.

I continued to gaze out the window with sad eyes. It was true and everybody knew it. I didn't need ot say anything to agree.

Later that night, Tsunade-sensei hadn't returned and I was beyond worry. Leaving Sakura to check up on the patients for the night, I quickly left the hospital. As I walked outside, a rush of summer air hit my face. The sun had set for the most part, leaving the sky in a blue and purple mural. Taking in a large breath of warm air, I set out for the cemetary.

I reached the depressing location only minutes later. Quietly, I walked past the silent graves, names carved in cursive and eulogies written on the stone plaques. My eyes scanned the copious amount of rows until I spotted the blonde head of Tsunade-sensei. Her green jacket, its colored dulled by the night sky, stuck out slightly against the rows of gray stone. Somberly, I walked over.

Without a word, I sat down next to my sensei, knees to my chest. We didn't glance at each other. Tsunade-sensei continued watching Dan's grave and I gazed upon it as well. We sat in silence; even the crickets were silent in melencoly mourning.

After quite some time, Tsunade-sensei spoke. Her voice cracked and it was weak. "It's the anniversary of his death today."

My eyelids drooped in sadness. That explained everything. That simple sentence that meant so much. I didn't dare speak, but Tsunade-sensei knew I was listening.

To my hidden surprise, Sensei continued. "It was so long ago, but I can remember like it was yesterday."

Tsunade-sensei's body began to tremble as she brought shakey hands to her face. A whimper escaped her pink lips as memories rushed back to her. For the first time, I turned to watch her.

After a minute, Tsunade-sensei closed her eyes. A tear, sparkling from the cresent moon appearing above, slid from her right eye, gliding down her ceramic cheek.

"He wanted to be Hokage. The job I found so foolish; not at the time. He would have done so much for this village. He would have done a much better job than I've done," several tear began to fall from her eyes.

I didn't mean for my voice to crack. "You're living his dream for him."

A smile graced Tsunade-sensei's features for the slightest moment as the tears began to fall one after the other, her melencoly pouring out through them uncontrollably. This side of Sensei I had never set eyes on; it was frightening. Such an icon of strength, and here she was, in such a shakey form. Though, blaming her was far from my thoughts. I continued to lend my ears to her.

"If only...if only..." she paused, hair covering her face. Her voice was shaking as she cried. "Oh, what I wouldn't give to hold him in my arms again. To see him smiling at me. To hear his laugh. To feel that feeling of security when he stood beside me; when he held me close to him."

She couldn't continue as she let out a pained cry. She continued loudly as she grabbed her knees and hugged them to her chest.

'Oh...Tsunade-sensei...'

I had done it without thought; it just seemed right. I leaned over and wrapped my arms around her shaking form. I could feel her body tense for a moment, but as I hugged her tighter, she trembled again, crying out her pain.

A while later when Sensei had calmed down and the tears dried upon her face, I released Tsunade-sensei. She wiped at her right wither her index finger and let out a shuddered sigh. "I'm sorry."

I shook my head, then looked to the sky. It was getting rather late and my parents were not going to be very happy. I looked to my sensei. "I have to-"

Tsunade-sensei cut me off wit a nod. I let out an unaudible sigh and stood up. "Goodnight."

Tsunade-sensei listened as my footsteps faded away. She closed her eyes and put two fingers to her lips. She kissed them lightly and pressed them upon his name. She stood up and before walking away, stared at his headstone. "Goodnight."

_Dedicated to my Beloved_

_January 7, 2007_


End file.
